S2E18 President Garner Reacts Take 1: Christian College TikToks
For this week’s podcast, we thought it’d be fun to have Institute President Gregg Garner react to TikToks Gen Z are creating about their Christian college experiences. Because he’s reacting live to videos, and some of them don’t even have audio, but words on the screen, this episode is best experienced by watching, not just listening.
We’ve kept the episode very real life, so sometimes Gregg tells me to rewind something or start again. We wanted you to feel like you were in the room with us, so welcome in!
To watch this episode, search The Institute for GOD on YouTube, click over to the College Conversations Podcast, Season 2, episode 18. While you’re there, be sure to subscribe so you can watch all episodes of College Conversations and other regular videos The Institute posts.
If you want more reactions videos, send them our way at conversations@instituteforgod.org.
Enjoy!
[00:00:10.80] - Video 1
Two days into bible college, and I think I found my wife. Teachers giving words of knowledge about the secrets night. And what is hermeneutics? Why is Greek life so damn hard? I just wanna preach a message and lead worship on guitar. My girlfriend thinks I'm moving too fast. I think she really wants me to ask. I might just get down on one knee in the middle of the calf. I gotta give a ring by spring. Got two more hours of fasting. My intern project kinda stinks, but I do it for the lord in queue. I gotta go. It's chapel time. You found your calling. God bless my love. Thought by now that I will find. Yes. I'm crying, but I'm fine. I just, you know, love the Lord.
[00:01:02.29] - Gregg Garner
Alright. Well, gosh. I I I think, that's that's what a lot of hip hop today sounds like without auto tune. If you could take off auto tune, probably sound just like that guy. Outside of that, it's gosh. That that song could have been sung in the nineties at my Christian college. I I don't think much seems to have changed. And I I I do I think it's funny. I think it's funny. I think, some people live that out. I think that's what makes it funny. Right? Like, people are living out the work at Chick fil A, just go be a youth pastor, feel that school's too hard and just wanna get through it. And in the end, you're gonna get married anyways, so we'll just move forward with life. I do think a lot of people go to Christian schools. It's it's for the social networking, and and, I don't have any issues with it. But dude's funny. The Mickey Mouse out, man. That's something else.
[00:01:57.90] - Video 2
Things that I've actually overheard at my Christian college, part one. Dude, you got a ninety four on the test. How did how did you do that? I sat down and said a fat prayer right before I took it. Nice, dude.
[00:02:12.09] - Gregg Garner
I never heard about fat prayer before. Like, you know, I don't know this chick, and I don't I don't know where she comes from. Seems like she's sweet. I I don't know if that's anybody I ever would've met with. But, yeah, nice dude as a response would probably be what I'd say to somebody if they they're like I said a fat prayer. I mean, growing up where I came from, the only thing that you would talk about, like, that you did that was fat before anything was a blunt. So I I don't know. That's a funny video. Fat blunts, fat prayers. Let's go.
[00:02:49.09] - Video 3
Hey, pastor Mark. Thank you so much for sharing tonight. But can I go ahead and just say that I absolutely disagree with everything you just said? Like, your theology is way off, man. So you should really check your heart because I just have a feeling that it's not in the right place. And I know I'm a little bit younger than you, but spiritually, I am light years ahead of you. I'm basically your authority figure in that area. Alright? Honestly, I should be the one running your ministry because you're doing it all wrong. But I'm looking forward to hearing you share again, man. It was great, and I know next time will be so good.
[00:03:21.69] - Gregg Garner
That that that one's really funny. I've met that guy so many times. I might have even been that guy when I was younger. But gosh. Yeah. But I think I think that guy is is cousins with the guy who also comes up and says things like, hey. I really wanna thank you for that sermon, that teaching. Like, it it really reminded me of, of what I already knew. I mean, like, I knew what you were saying. I just hadn't remembered it, and now you remind me of it, and I wanna thank you for that. It also reminds me of a story probably about twenty five years ago. I was a young guy preaching. This is the beginning of our ministry, and that happened to me exactly. The guy the young guy who's maybe in high school came up, told me pretty much the same thing. You're wrong about everything you just said. Here's the real interpretation of it. And, at the time, I was like, man, should I rebuttal this guy right now and and just tell him why I think what I thought? Instead, I think I think he just wanna tell me what he thought in the story. And today, social media makes it a lot easier. Right? You can just get online and complain about something, tell somebody something. But, anyways, yeah, those dudes are all over the place.
[00:04:37.69] - Video 4
So I'm gonna say three things I wish I knew before starting bible college. I know some of you may be starting bible college, so I want to give you some tips and tricks and things I wish I knew. So number one, don't make your homework your god time. So many times in bible college you get homework by reading the bible. I had a class where I had to read like a hundred chapters of the bible in like a month. Maybe I'm exaggerating. I can't remember, but I do remember it was a lot. But you cannot do your homework and call it your god time because then it's gonna be more like you're studying god than you're growing in an intimate relationship with God. And yes, if you're in Bible college, you're in there for theology. Like, you wanna study God and, like, learn about him. But you can't sacrifice your intimate relationship with him. So keep those two separate. Second is people are not as scary as you think. Everyone's looking for community. Everyone's looking for friends. So be that person that goes up to somebody and say, hey. What class are you in? Or, hey. What year are you in? What program are you in? People are not as scary as you think. I'm running out of time, but I'll make a part two.
[00:05:39.19] - Gregg Garner
She was gonna do three and she did two. That's great. To her her first point, I think I get her heart where she's coming from that, you you can't substitute your time doing homework with spending some relational time with God. I probably wouldn't go as far as saying that your homework is so disconnected from your relationship with God that studying God is, or has lesser value. I think that we try to encourage our students that your homework is an opportunity for worship, that when you are studying, you are engaging through obedience the most important curriculum that anybody could attach themselves to. So if she had a hundred chapters of the Bible to read, inviting God into that and developing a relationship through getting a knowledge of the Lord is really important. I know that if you were to have a relationship with somebody like me, relationship with my wife, like, there's it's not just about me hanging out with her. There's I I do have to dive into and study who she is and all the different ways she presents herself so that in an attentive fashion, I can be the best other for her in all kinds of contexts, and I I think it's always sweet when either she or my kids say something like, how'd you know that? And why'd you do that? Or even my friends will do that, and I'll say, well, I noticed that you did this and did that. Like, you're always paying attention. And, I I probably developed all that just by being a student of God's word and learning to read the Bible. The second thing that she talked about I'm trying to remember here. Lori helped me out. She says scary. Oh, people aren't a scary thing. And I I I don't know. People are scary. Some people are really scary, especially religious and weird people. They're the scariest. I was scared of a lot of people at my Christian college, and the more religious and weird they were, the more scared I was. I think I was I don't know. I was a young guy. I was growing. I think what she's trying to communicate is that, Christian community should be a safe place to develop friendships. And, the Christian community that is guided by the spirit of God, where at the center of it is, the authority of his word, you can find the safety Let's do it again. I wanna do it again because at first, I thought it was Gabby Lassiter and Mercy Warren, and and Lydia. Just my first glance. So I just I was like, what are they doing? And I I totally missed it. Come on. Look at the video. It it could you can cross your eyes a little bit. It's them a little bit. Alright. Let's do this again. Oh, yeah. There you go. It's funny. Everyone's engaged is is one of the the things there. I I that that's not our experience here at at the institute. Not to say that people don't get engaged. We have a few people who are engaged, just not everyone's engaged, and, no sleep. Sometimes. I think I think because our college was designed, by people kinda fresh out of college, we acknowledged that there are these things that we thought were cool when you're in college, and but then they were detrimental to you when you look back on them. So we've tried to design things in such a way where we give accountability to our students so that they do get a little bit of sleep. And if they don't, that's on them because they they chose to, exercise their autonomy and, I don't know. The the the cons to being at bible college I don't know if it's a con if people are are getting engaged. I don't know if it's a con if people are losing sleep because they're doing great things. I don't remember what the other thing was on there. Lots of workload. And I don't know if that's a con either if if your work is studying god's word. So maybe maybe these ladies could be a little more positive.
[00:10:32.29] - Video 5
[00:10:41.70] - Gregg Garner
So were those pickup lines? Is that what that was? Oh, man. Crazes. Yeah. That's hilarious, dude, and gross. It's weird. It's weird. At first, I thought it was, like, Taylor Swift's little sister or something who's gonna tell us something. But, that's funny, dude. If the those are you must be here for the kids ministry. I mean, what is the implication there? Those those pictures are funny. That was that was funny. I think, I'll have to I'd have to watch it again to make more sense of it. Let's go to the next one. Hey. That's that's great. I'm I'm glad people are having fun in college. I don't know who said Bible college wasn't fun. That looked like it could have been any college, frankly. Didn't seem to need it in. If anything, maybe that video might show that Bible college isn't as fun as other colleges. But I I agree. Bible college could be fun. You should make it fun. That's wonderful. I I I think that's a pretty normal process that, you come to know what you didn't know you didn't know. And when that happens, that can be a little jolting. And you just gotta keep keep learning, continue the course. If you want to, you can look at, something called the Dunning Kruger curve, and that'll help you to understand that feeling, that drop in the parabola when all of a sudden your confidence, gets a little little shaken. I've often referred to this with students and and given them the analogy that when you're young and you have all that faith and enthusiasm and you wanna go to Bible college because you feel a calling, your relationship with God, you feel, is really strong. And you've really got a good image of God, but your image of God is like your knowledge of the Eiffel Tower. You know what the Eiffel Tower looks like because you've seen it in pictures, and and and you've seen it on those postcards. And when you look at it, I mean, literally, it's this big. But if you were ever to go, and if I was to just stand you right in front of the Eiffel Tower, I mean, right up next to it, and I took you there blindfolded, then took the blindfold off and said, where are you? You probably wouldn't know. And, that's what it's like studying God's word and getting to know the Lord. You're gonna get close. And the closer you get, the more you're gonna realize, like, god. I didn't I didn't know I didn't know what I didn't know. And, I think the analogy works for explaining that. So I I I would be comforted. Don't don't worry about the fact that your your faith is being challenged. It's, the Bible teaches us in first Corinthians three that we we wanna have the kind of faith that's built in such a way that it can even pass through fire. And, you you gotta have it tested in that way. So seems like she's having a good experience. That's pretty funny. Oh, man. Yeah. I I think one of the things that, missionaries missionaries, sometimes it's interesting because they're working cross culturally. Right? But a lot of missionaries have very little education in things like cultural anthropology. And they they don't understand the difference between a worldview and a cultural practice. And so they sometimes mistakenly confuse external practices as a root cause or or that they embody worldview. So, I mean, you can obviously burn incense, and it have nothing to do with your worship of the devil. And and, so I think it it's pretty funny. If anything, it's showing generational gaps. This the the younger generation is, practice having cultural practices that are now readily available. You can go to the YMCA and do yoga. And, but maybe for some of the boomer missionaries that came to your church or or or older, that was something that was characterized by the eastern mysticism that they they had to educate people away from or out of. So I think it's all about context and having mercy and recognizing that just because a person asserts themselves with authority doesn't always mean they're right, and that everybody can learn. And, I I I I think I try to teach students that there's three things to consider. Things could be good. They could be bad. They could be neutral as well. And, by learning God's word according to Hebrews five, you develop the kind of faculties of righteousness that help you to discern between what's good, bad, and finally even what could be neutral.
[00:15:58.50] - Video 6
Things I heard at my bible college part one. Man, that girl, doesn't she know if she's being a stumbling block? Because she was wearing a sundress.
[00:16:09.60] - Gregg Garner
This dude's zesty. So am I not gonna watch part two, just part one?
[00:16:14.20] - Video 7
Things ever heard of Bible College part two. Yeah. I wanna get a tattoo, but I wanna wait until I'm married so that I know my husband approves of it.
[00:16:23.29] - Gregg Garner
Got it. He was he was he was being the the girlfriend, that explains it. Yeah. Those very well may be things that, people say in college. I I think it's, I think it's funny. What was the first thing he said? I was so thrown off by his blouse. And the second thing…
[00:16:45.00] - Laurie Kagay
He said, do they not know does she not know she's in a stumbling block?
[00:16:48.89] - Gregg Garner
Oh, yeah. Stumbling block because she's wearing a a sundress. I I don't know, man. This this goes with the whole cultural thing. I I have a twenty one year old daughter, and I love when she wears her sundresses. I think she's so cute. I think that what we need to do is, teach, young men how to practice a healthy form of manhood and how their eyes can, change. They don't have to look through the sundress. They can just appreciate the sundress, and I I don't know. It's it's an interesting thing. I I grew up in a in a Christianity where, if that that was the kind of teaching to the degree that a girl could be a stumbling block. So all the girls in my youth group were, like, wearing big baggy sweaters, so they they wouldn't influence a guy. And I would even find myself, looking at girls just telling myself, eye contact, eye contact, eye contact, which is really tough when girls wear those shirts that like this one that says institute on it. You kinda wanna read the shirt, but you don't wanna look like you're reading the shirt because they might not think you're reading the shirt. You might be doing something else. And and that that kind of stuff is is is interesting. I I I am all about giving girls the safety to, express themselves and be comfortable in their own bodies. And, I don't think that it always has to have some kind of sexual undertone. I think that, the girls wear sundresses because, one, it's culturally acceptable, and secondly, it's hot outside. And, it's it's comfortable. And they they might even feel pretty doing it, and that's that's great.
[00:18:29.59] - Video 8
Did anybody else go to, like, a small Christian bible college and you look back and you're like, that literally was not real. All I was concerned about was journaling and, like, underlining in my, like, journaling Bible. And, like, I love the Lord. I still read my Bible. I think it's awesome. But I look back and I'm like, you were so naive naive to the real world. And then some people who are, like, still living that life where all they know how to do is, like, sit at a coffee shop and journal, I'm like, do you have a job?
[00:19:00.90] - Gregg Garner
Yeah. I don't know what Bible college you went to. I I would say, we do encourage our students to journal, and they probably do a lot of those reflective exercises, like, at the beginning of the year. Maybe they touch on the middle, maybe a little bit at the end. But, yeah, that's I'm not sure our students would characterize their experience at their bible school by cute little journaling and underlining things in their bible. So I I think she had a a unique experience perhaps, but I do agree with her. Young people need exposure to how the world, really works and and what it looks like. And that's why at our college, that's exactly what we do. We intentionally bring about those kinds of exposures, not just here in the United States, but even all around the world. And it's not a sterile experience either. We we take our young people into some of the the hardest places for human beings to have to live, and they get to see the real world in a way that impacts them and fuels them even more to see God's kingdom come and his will be done so that things can change for people who find themselves suffering and in need of savior.
[00:20:08.70] -Video 9
Things at my Christian university that would send other university kids into an actual coma. I made a whole list. The list is definitely not needed because I complain about it every single day but here we go. First thing we're gonna talk about is visitation. Oh, you wanna have someone in your dorm? No. Not even an option. Option.
That one took me for a loop because how you meant to make friends if you can't have people in your dorm? Next one that like actually like blew my mind was we have a curfew at 11:30. You know, No, that's just not even an option because you have to be in bed. And moving on from that is you have an RA that checks on you every single night. They walk in actually like bedroom at 11:30 and they're just there. Hey. And you have to be ready to talk to them. Dorms, it is all girls in this dorm. There's no male. They walk in, God forbid. Moving on to classes. I showed up to class. And there were
[00:20:54.90] - Gregg Garner
Give me a pause here. Let me so this this young lady just needs someone to tell her why those rules exist. She seems fun, and, she's making observations, but she just needs to be told, you know, the reason why you're not just gonna allow boys in there is because this is the girl's living space, and it's not like a regular house where you can have, like, a a that your bedroom is your living area. Dorms, your bedroom, in some ways, feels like your living area. But at a house, like, if a guy was to come over to your house where he grew up, they could wait in the living room in case they came at a time. Maybe after school, you had sports practice and you needed to get showered and changed, they're not gonna walk in your room in the midst of all that because there's a waiting area. In the same way, usually dorms have, like, a lobby area, and nobody can regulate when everybody's showering or not, especially in dorms when you have public restrooms and and showers and such. So it's a real practical restriction to keep guys out of there so that you don't have the incident where a girl finds herself in an uncomfortable position because a roommate made an invite, and they were even even things that normally happen, like, these young ladies leaving out their their clothing places. Maybe they left out a bra, and then another girl brings a guy into the room, and the bra's out on the on the bed. Maybe they feel super embarrassed about that. So, there there's there's reasons. The RA is there. It's called accountability. They wanna make sure that, you are where you're supposed to be at the right time. And the reason why they have a curfew for you is because even though you have legal capacity as an adult, your executive capacity in your brain hasn't been fully developed, and it could feel like a really great idea to not go to sleep tonight or to just do a bunch of other things and stay up all night when, in fact, you're compromising your immune system. You are negatively impacting I don't have to say that that occasionally that isn't fun or something you shouldn't do. But, you're you're there to go to school, and you're there to succeed in your classes. And that's hard to do when you're exhausted. So some of these things are just real practical, and she probably just needs someone to explain to her. I bet you if I got to talk to her, she'd be like, you know, that makes sense. Otherwise, don't go to that school. I know that there are lots of secular colleges. They don't get ripped.
[00:23:18.79] - Laurie Kagay
You wanna keep going? Yeah.
[00:23:19.59] - Gregg Garner
Yeah. I wanna keep I wanna listen to her.
[00:23:21.40] - Video 9 Continued
Class, you pray before every single class. And on top of classes, schoolwork, you have to go to mandatory chapel. They have it three times a week and you can like choose when you go but you need a certain amount of credits before the year ends, and it is way too many. Not only do you have to add chapel to your to do list, you have to have forty five hours of community service.
[00:23:42.79] - Gregg Garner
Yeah. Let's pause on this girl. So I don't I don't think she should have gone to Christian school. I think the the right candidates to go to Christian school are, like, we get to have chapel three times a week. What what kind of opportunities are we gonna have to serve our community? This sounds just like something Jesus would want us to do. I I think she just, didn't maybe didn't know what she was getting into. And for her to use terms like forced, that that's that's probably not at all true. She likely signed a code of conduct agreement when she came to the school that acknowledged these are expectations. The Bible teaches us that we shouldn't forsake the fellowship of believers, and chapel is an opportunity to give with your classmates, worship God together. And praying before every class is is an important it can be ritual ritual, but it's an important practice because it acknowledges God. It helps everybody recognize that this is this is not just merely any space. Right now, we're invoking the name of God. This has become a sacred space and a place for us to learn. I I think she just maybe she shouldn't have gone to Christian college.
[00:24:50.40] - Video 9 Continued
But you will have so much time to do all of this extra stuff because there are no frats, no parties, no tailgates, none of that because there's no drugs, alcohol, sex, any of that on campus.
[00:25:04.00] - Gregg Garner
Well, I I went to a Christian college, and all of that stuff was on campus. So she she's probably maybe she's, like, in her first couple of weeks and hasn't found them yet. Now a really small Christian school, of course, you can better regulate. I went to a large Christian, which is now liberal arts university. But you can always find trouble. Trouble is everywhere. But I I I think, I I think when she gives that report, most people, parents in particular, would be like, that sounds great. What a great environment for my kids to not be distracted by things that are destructive. So the the this young lady's interesting. I don't know what she's looking for.
[00:25:40.79] - Video 9 Continued
It's, like, five minutes from the beach, but we have a dress code. So if you're going to the beach and you're all soaking wet, you better be ready to, like, slide on some jeans or something to cover up because you cannot walk on campus. Like, if you go to the gym, you better be ready to be actually sweating because you cannot wear anything, like, short. So you just get so hot always. But Christian Schools, they have their ups, they have their downs. Everyone is super nice and like sweet and it's a very nice green. But it is definitely some of the things that sent me into a coma in my first week. I was like, what? Literally getting ready to go to church to get my chapel credit. So I'm on my way. I do have to change outfits, so obviously.
[00:26:17.50] - Gregg Garner
Yeah. She had no idea what she was getting into. I hope she sticks around.
[00:26:21.40] - Video 10
Here are some crazy Christian college rules, part two. At At Maranatha University, they do not accept anyone who has been divorced or is married to a divorcee. You cannot wear Abercrombie infant or Hollister. Your side burns cannot go past the bottom of your ear. For facial hair, men cannot have patchy beards, a chin curtain, soul patch, pencil beard, or mutton chops. If you attend Appalachian Bible College, you also cannot date anyone who has been divorced. Women can wear earrings, but they cannot draw attention to you or your face or anything like that. You can also get a degree in camping ministry. Once you're engaged at Appalachian Baptist College, you have to go talk to the deans about your plans for marriage. You attend Commonwealth Baptist College. You can't play cards or go to the movies or participate in other questionable activities. At Heartland Bible College, you have to have a chaperone on every single date. You cannot date anyone who's not Baptist. Not allowed to date the first semester of your freshman year. You not only need a chaperone, but you also need a dating pass. And to go on a date, you have to request a date pass from the dean's office. When answering faculty, you have to use sir or ma'am. Not only can you not go to the movie theaters, you're not allowed to stream movies or TV on your own personal devices either. If You get married during the semester, you have to automatically withdraw from the school. If you decide to start the divorce process while attending Heartland, you have to withdraw from the school immediately. They do this because they believe that you need to work on reconciliation with your person, so continuing college might be a hindrance to that process. At Ambassador Baptist College, what degree you're allowed to choose depends on your gender. They have a list of degrees for men and for women. At BYU, men cannot have beards. You must abstain from tea and coffee, and you have to go to church. Compared to all the other schools that I researched, BYU is one of the most progressive. In the last video, everyone was asking, how is this stuff legal? How are they allowed to enforce these rules? How do they enforce the rules? Well, let me introduce you to the worst thing ever, title nine exemptions. Title nine is a law that does not allow any institution to discriminate. Enough put simply, there's a very long history with title nine and the ways that's been, like, changed and modified. Items. Religious organizations are allowed to get exemptions from Title IX. Legally allows them to have certain requirements for students to be enrolled at the school. And a lot of these exempt schools, they actually are accredited surprisingly. Not only that, these schools are just allowed to have rules because they see it as like an at will type of thing. Like you're choosing to be here. These are our rules. If you don't abide by these rules, you have to suffer the consequences. Why would anyone choose to go to these schools? And you have to remember that when you grow up religious, you are primed to go to these schools. You are made to go to these schools. You were taught that these schools will keep you safe and it's what you need to not go down a bad path. So you grow up knowing people who went to these schools, you grow up going to camp at these schools, you grow up going to camp with people who are going to these schools. Also, some families will only pay for Christian colleges. So these schools rely on snitches. Everyone knows everything about everyone, and you never wanna be guilty by association either. If you had to choose between going to a Christian college and being drafted, what would you choose? I think I would choose being drafted.
[00:29:10.79] - Gregg Garner
I think one of the funniest things about social media is that when someone confidently asserts an opinion, we can sometimes confuse it as fact. I don't know who this young lady is. She, is obviously biased against Christian or religious schools. And, if she would rather be drafted, she probably has no idea what that likely means, especially when we look at American society and the last time the draft happened and the ways in which it shaped our culture at large and how, even up to this day, the concept of drafting is something that, people wanna stay away from as as much as possible because it is a very challenging effort to invoke. So the fact that she would take something so serious and so meaningful to our history as a nation and then compare it to something that's foundational to our history as a nation, which is religious freedom, is pretty funny. I I feel for her. I I think if she had explained to her that, freedom is a hallmark of our society and one of the gifts that we have in the United States. She would let these people make their decisions. Do I agree with all the things that these schools are doing now. Some of them seem really silly and funny to me, but I'm very glad they have the right to exercise that kind of freedom within their scope of understanding what would be healthy. Of course, if any of those things are creating a deprivation of freedom on any level, at least we know we have the law to, make that unconstitutional and and change those kinds of things. Title nine exemption is, a necessity because of the foundations of our constitution with respect to religious freedom. So I don't know. The young lady just confused. She needs to maybe she should go to law school, and then she can learn a little bit more about what she's talking about. Or maybe she can actually visit a Christian school and see that even within the constraints of the kind of systems that are created, if she found the rationale behind them, she would discover that people are trying to do their best with what they know, to take care of people and push forward how they understand health to to be. But she instead seems to be a sensationalist that wants to make a a big deal out of something incredibly normative. She should try going to India and contending with the three hundred and thirty million gods and the the variations in cultural practice that exist in in a land of Muslims and Hindus and Christians and, see what she has to say there. Eventually, she'll be the only person right in the whole world. So I think she just needs to grow up a little bit. Yeah. Seems like she had a great day. I I I couldn't tell if it was like a preview day for youth groups of students or whatever, but sounds like they just did a normal day of people getting together and celebrating their faith and, having some music and meals together. I don't know. Nothing nothing seemed too extraordinary about that video, but it's great. I'm happy for him.
[00:33:42.20] - Video 11
Hello? Mom? Yeah. Can you come get me? People are getting engaged.
[00:33:44.40] - Gregg Garner
You know, the the reason why all this engaged stuff comes up is because non Christians, they they they don't wait to get married to have sex. So they're just going for it. Where Christian kids who are at the stage in life where they want to experience enhanced levels of intimacy with their, their love interest, they they recognize that the threshold they have to pass over is the marital one. So they wanna go things go about things that they consider to be the right way. And so marriage is the door they have to pass through, so they're getting engaged. And, that that's why it becomes so much a part of Christian culture, and these are the this is the age when people start, thinking about marriage, and it seems to expedite. People often use, like, first Corinthians seven to highlight the burning of passion that exists in a young person to expedite the marriage scenario. But that that that's that's why all this is happening, and I think we fail to recognize that if it were a a secular institution where the, sacrament of marriage is not promoted as a threshold prerequisite for, for sexual relations, then it it it's it's not a thing. But at a Christian institution, when it is, it it that's that's why everybody's getting engaged. That's what's going on. Now am I saying that's right or that's, like, the healthy thing? No. Not divorce rate for people who decided to get married in Christian college or or, how many of those engagements actually follow through? I knew people who got engaged two or three times during their time at Christian college. And and then what does engagement unlock in terms of intimacy progression? There's so many things to talk about that, I I you know, when you're when you're in high school, you've got your youth pastor in your youth group. You talk about all this stuff. You get into college, and you you may have them as, like, a mentor, but now you're not talking about these these things. And now you talk to your friends. So you have peer conversations with everybody. Hopefully, you can become part of a community or a church that has, like, a college youth pastor or or you're a part of a college as a chaplain and and other people can talk about these things or classes that educate you on it. But I don't know. I I think it was a funny video.
[00:36:19.59] - Video 12
I had so much fun. I love you. Do you talk to other people? Be honest. Please don't lie to me. I love you.
[00:36:27.80] - Gregg Garner
I think I think that's pretty funny. I actually know a guy who, on his first date with a girl in bible college, told her he loved her. But the funny thing was she she told them that she loved them back, and now they've been married about twenty years and have four kids. So sometimes it works. You know? I think, there there is a lot of that, desire in young people to find that that mate, and they are really excited about it. But they're also young and immature. And, my advice to you is, if if if the person that you're falling in love with is very jealous of you, like, be cautious. Be cautious. You you want you want a person who, loves and trusts you, and, where jealousy doesn't characterize your relationship. You know, I I kinda feel too serious for these videos. I don't know if I'm a good candidate for these Christian videos. They're they're they're I I I suppose they're fun. This is totally outside the scope of of what my generation came up with. This is very Gen z right now. I'm in Gen z world, and, I'm a very analytical guy. So let let's let's let's do some more of these.
[00:37:44.09] - Video 13
Hey. Are are you a freshman? Tight. Tight. I'm Stuart and, I don't mean to be so forward, but dude, you're freaking beautiful. I saw you across campus and, I hope this doesn't put you off, but I heard a voice in my head that said, you need to go talk to that girl. May I lay hands on you real quick? Not in a creepy way, like, can I pray for you? Tight. Tight. Father God, I just wanna lift up my girl Jennifer here to Jessica. I just wanna lift up my girl Jessica to you. I can tell Jessica is looking for her man. So father god, if you could deliver her to her spouse that you have divinely chosen already for her and open her eyes to whoever that is. That'd be tight. That'd be tight. Amen. So good meeting you. I'm over on third floor if you ever, ever want to have a devotional.
[00:38:35.59] - Gregg Garner
She must go to, like, some kind of Pentecostal school or something. But I I think I think that's funny. There's always that possibility that you have someone, utilizing their spirituality to to get, an advantage there in the the girl chasing. I I remember one time, my experience in college, we were doing a bonfire worship time, and I was leading worship for it. And it came this natural time where people started praying. And I remember, some of the girls would pray, and they're cute girl prayers. You know? What do I mean by that? I I think now as a dad with with a a daughter that and son, college age, that's where it comes from. Like, I think of my daughter praying as a cute little daughter prayer, but they're just nice prayers. And then the boys would pray. And when the boys some of the boys would pray, the girls would open their eyes and look at the boys. You could just see they're like, oh my gosh. What a godly man. But then I noticed that the boys started trying to outdo each other in prayer. And at a certain point, everybody prayed, and all the guys are outdoing each other, and I refuse to pray. And then the girls got on to me, and they're like, why don't you join everybody and pray? And then I asserted my opinion. I just think they're trying to impress you, and then they got all mad at me. But then the guys afterwards are like, bro, we were trying to impress. Why don't you join in? Which I thought was funny.
[00:39:51.19] - Video 14
I can go first. Requirements for my future mister. If he doesn't check all of these boxes, then he's not the guy for you. Yeah. Yeah. My future husband must be six foot five or taller, have dark hair, is nice, a good listener, is in amazing shape, will put me before any video games, comes from a big family but doesn't have any sisters, wants ten kids, has a perfect credit score, makes six figures, is a member at a country club, doesn't struggle, is never in a bad mood, has never dated anyone before me, loves to sing, is funny, has a six pack for days, agrees to merge our social medias, takes me skiing for my birthday every year, and presses 03:50 or more, signs a waiver he'll never look at another female again, can eat gluten, proposes at Disneyland. Is Jeremiah Christian Waters?
[00:40:54.30] - Gregg Garner
That girl's gonna be single her whole life. That's all I gotta say about that. Enjoy. Alright. That that that's it.